Let’s talk about ENGAGEMENT RINGS!
I got engaged to my fiance Zach in March of 2021 (insert dancing emoji). Before our engagement, Zach asked if I wanted to be a part of the process of picking out my ring. I wanted that special moment we all see in the movies. The look we have when our forever person picks out the perfect ring for us. I wanted him to find a ring that when he saw it he instantly thought of me.
The night of our engagement a friend of mine kept asking me over and over again if I liked my ring. My response every time was yes, yes I do. Now at the time, I didn't think anything of it, that was until a mutual friend of ours got engaged a few days after me. As I was showing my friend a picture of the girl she zooms in on her ring. The next words out of her mouth were “Now that's an engagement ring!” Now, while I don't think she intended to hurt my feelings, but she did. In my head, it was as if she was saying my ring didn't meet the standard of what an engagement ring should look like. I didn't know what to do. So, I just dismissed myself and cried in the closet on the phone with my dad.
From then on those words constantly played over and over in my head. It also didn't help that she would make comments about how big and sparkly other girls' rings were in front of me. Her words were hurtful and soon got deep into my head that they started affecting how I felt about my ring. I started to think that my ring wasn't pretty, or big enough, or sparkly enough and it wasn't until I talked to my dad that I realized what I was doing. By having those feelings that my ring wasn't enough, I was internally saying that Zach wasn’t enough.
To me, there seems to be a stigma behind engagement rings. If your ring isn't big or flashy then it doesn't classify as an engagement ring. If your ring didn't cost $$$$ then it's considered cheap. These are just thoughts my roommate made me feel, by constantly making comments about my ring. However, as I noticed more and more people getting engaged I couldn't help but ask myself “would they still say yes even if the ring wasn't what it was.”
To this day I always tell people when I don't get the oh's and Ah's like I thought I would that he could have proposed to me with the twist tie that holds the loaf of bread together and I would have still said YES a million times. Now, I am not going to lie, I still catch myself playing the comparison game with other girls and their rings, but I realize that every ring is unique to that person. And every girl should feel celebrated when they get engaged despite the size of their ring. So if you have a dainty ring like mine or the biggest rock in the world . . . .OWN IT GIRL!!
XOXO - Kaleigh